MY STORY

The practice of yoga has played a significant role in teaching me how to like myself. Liking ourselves may seem simple - but for some of us it is not easy or automatic. From ages six to fourteen, I was a competitive gymnast who was given the nickname “Thunder Thighs.” Every week, for eight years, I was told I had to lose another pound in order to be better. The takeaway message this young girl had stamped in her brain was, “I’m fat and not good enough.”

I've read that human beings have forty to eighty thousand thoughts every day – for the most part, the same ones stuck on repeat. Fast forward many years, and when I did the math I realized I had repeated those demeaning words to myself internally over four million times. The result was that I felt fat and inadequate most of the time - regardless of my fluctuating weight or any of the successes I was achieving in life. Consequently, my innate desire to help others was stifled by my lack of belief in my own value, fear of failure, and the realization that until I had an understanding of what “happy” felt like, I was useless to others.

When I heard the message that your words (internal thoughts and those spoken aloud) along with your feelings (attitudes and actions) create your reality, something clicked for me and I sprung into action. I spent a year researching the mind-body connection, practicing brain retraining exercises, and repeating positive affirmations. I also restarted my yoga practice which had been set aside to focus on growing my career. Twelve months later, my body had changed - but what was even more significant was the unseen changes that had taken place within me.

I started my yoga practice like many other students I know, attracted to the physical fitness and stress reducing aspect of the classes. I quickly fell in love with the internal inquiry, self compassion, and feeling of deep connection to my true Self that was the result of the focus, breath and physical effort of each practice. That connection is what keeps me hooked to this day, and what lead me to search for more out of my practice. When my amazingly strong, active and motivated dad fell ill and began to lose his motor skills, I had to ask myself the question, "How will I achieve that connection, inner peace, moment of bliss when I can no longer jump back into chatturanga, kick up into a handstand, or experience that heart opening joy of upward facing dog. How will I connect with my true self then?"

In addition to the fact that I felt physically stronger than I had in years, each practice gave me a few cherished moments of quiet in my mind. That peace brought about self-awareness and caused a necessary shift toward positive self-talk, uplifting speech patterns, self-acceptance and eventually self-love. I was so positively impacted by my practice that, thanks to my dad having once said to me, “Sometimes not taking the risk is the biggest risk of all!” I became a yoga teacher at age 40 and have taught steadily, and continued to learn, since then!

I am grateful to my teachers. Each of them has diligently done their job of helping me wake up to myself…to my gifts, the blessings in my life, as well as to my samskaras (habitual patterns in my mind and body).

 My first teacher, Tamal Dodge, taught me Vinyasa Flow; the basics about the postures and the beauty of the sacred Yoga Sutra’s and Vedic texts. My second teacher, Annie Carpenter, taught me the SmartFLOW method; how to utilize a strong focus on structural alignment combined with the sweetness of pranayama as tools for safe practice, self-inquiry, and self-acceptance.  My third teacher, Dr. Joseph Michael Levry (Naam Yoga founder and internationally sought after Spiritual Master), helped me answer that question about how I would connect to the divine within when the day came that I couldn’t practice Vinyasa any longer; he taught me how to utilize devotional mantra meditations to clean the mind, healing mudras to direct energy within the body, ancient breathwork with micro yoga movements to awaken the organs and energy body, and Divine Spiritual Wisdom to tap into the laws of the universe and connect with the Universal Oneness. My 4th teacher, Patricia Moreno (founder of IntenSati), taught me to be relentless with my word and allow myself to be vulnerably authentic as a Sati (mindfulness) Leader (change maker).

I combine all I’ve learned from these amazing teachers, along with a lifetime of experience and knowledge I gained growing up in the fitness industry - I taught aerobics, dance, and personally trained clients in gyms since I quit competitive gymnastics at 14 years old - and as a self-professed self-help junkie! I love to blend precise movement with a variety of breathing techniques. I am drawn to helping others discover their unconscious habitual patterns (physically, emotionally, and mentally) because that has been absolutely life-changing for me.

My clients and students tell me they love that I actually teach them, rather than just calling out postures. I am not the teacher to practice with if you want to mindlessly flow in your same old ways. I am who you want to practice with when you are ready to expand beyond what you thought was possible for you. And, while I may use a posture or breathing technique to guide you there, really what I teach is mindfulness; self-inquiry; how to slow down enough to observe and be present with yourself, your thoughts, your habits; how to be compassionate with what comes up for you; how to love yourself and others unconditionally; and how to wake up and live consciously.

Because, it is from there (and only from there) that any of us can choose thoughts we want to think, say words that uplift ourselves and others, and take actions that feel inspired from within. This is how we create the lives we dream of…through consciousness!

In addition to my weekly class schedule, I work individually with clients as a MInd Body Mentor. I have an immense toolbox filled with wisdom and techniques, as well as a keenly honed intuitive intelligence, which I use to guide my clients to dive deeply within themselves in order to expand. I am a Vinyasa, Breathwork, and Naam Teacher Trainer and love to lead workshops, retreats and trainings to individuals, groups, and companies here in the US and abroad.

 

 

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The practice of yoga has played a significant role in teaching me how to like myself.
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